With This Pen I Write,

What my heart wants to say,

But my mind cannot put into words,

With This Pen I Write,

How I feel,

However if someone were to ask me,

I’d have nothing but a forced smile,

And only the ability to mutter,

“I’m ok”

Not because I think they don’t care enough,

Not because I don’t want them to worry,

Not because I don’t want to talk about it,

Because I do,

It’s because not even I know what’s wrong with me…

Oh how I wish you would text me one day,

Telling me that you missed me,

Telling me that you still loved me,

Telling me that you wanted to make it work,

Even though it might be too late,

Because for you it’ll never be too late,

The day I wrote in your notebook that I’d always love you,

The day that I spoke those same words,

I meant every syllable,

And if you’re ever thinking,

Wanting me back,

With your fingers paused over my name,

Don’t hesitate for a second,

Because I will always be waiting for you,

Even if you never come back,

The wait will still all have been worth it…

When we broke up I realized that,

There Is No One Else,

Anyone else would just be a place holder,

Until you returned into my life again,

I realized that I had found the one,

The one for me,

And yet I had to let her go,

Not because anything was wrong,

No no no…

Everything was great,

And I don’t know if that make it feel worse or better,

But because of circumstances out of our control,

It had to end,

When we broke up I realized anyone else,

Would just be a distraction,

A distraction from the world we could’ve had,

Could have…

More then any of this,

It breaks my heart to think,

That there’s a possibility you don’t even feel the same way…

I truly thought I was over you.

Until the night I laid in my bed.

It was so comfortable that day.

Especially after the long day.

However my heart ached.

Because it reminded me of you.

How I felt in your arms.

However your arms weren’t wrapped around me.

And you weren’t there.

Watching over me as I drift to sleep.

Like you did for so many nights.

And the room.

Filled to the brim with darkness.

Only made it feel worse…

It used to make me sad,

The thought of you never being in my life again,

The thought of getting over you,

The thought of forgetting the memories we made,

But now…

Now that I feel indifferent,

No emotion at all,

It doesn’t bother me,

I mean you didn’t care,

The last time we talked you didn’t care,

At first that bothered me,

But now…

Now I get it…

Right person, Wrong Time,

Or Wrong person, Right Time,

Because if they were the right person,

Can it really be the wrong time,

If it was the right person,

Your right person,

Wouldn’t you do anything to make it work,

Is it possible to meet your right person,

But have to let them go,

Maybe it’s Wrong Person, Right Time,

Here to give you the lessons needed to meet your right person,

If you really cared,

If you truly loved me like you made me believe,

We would’ve made it work,

But instead I was forced to say goodbye,

Before you could say it first…

When I met you,

I realized Home is a place,

However not one with for walls and a roof,

Filled with materialistic desires,

It’s the place nestled right between your arms,

Close enough to the beating of your heart,

As I slowly drift to sleep,

And when I awake,

You’re still here…